If Quite Convenient

Thou shalt have no other gods before me. -Exodus 20:3

 

It would be difficult, don't you agree, to look at the Ten Commandments  honestly and claim any degree of success in keeping them.

I mean that Sabbath one is pretty tough sometimes, right?

As for loving my neighbor as myself (Jesus called that the second one); I mean "come on!"

But how about the first one? Have you ever broken that commandment?

Wow. Hardly likely, you might say. God is God, after all, and the idea of there being some other god to put in front of Him seems ridiculous.

 But I have this tendency to be a lawbreaker, you see. So the question is: where have I failed? Honesty requires that I look into this question and, honestly, it has been a puzzler.

Then it occurred to me: I have been inconvenienced.

When was the last time you grumbled under your  breath? Or even cursed out loud? 

Was it when some foolish person pulled out in front of you? When you spilled grease on the stove? How about when a family member misplaced the TV remote?

Here is our new god, America: its name is Convenience.

It's not really some form of organized religion. We pretty much roll our own when it comes to how we worship it.

That's probably what makes it so hard to recognize. The serpent, you see, is more subtle than all the other beasts of the field so that it seems perfectly normal to feel put out and put-upon when we encounter the frustrations of this day-to-day life.

I don't need this kind of crap, do you?

 Hmm. 

You know, there appears to be a god behind this god, breathing life into it.

It is me. 

Have mercy, O Lord!

The Rat and Mr. Tolar's Teeth

 Warning: this is a rather involved story told from a hazy memory which will at last come to a point. I think.

So I have had dentures for almost as long as I had my real teeth. In fact, the only thing I remember about my real teeth is that I often had toothaches.

Early on, I was in the habit of never taking them out and finally got in the habit of just taking out the lower plate. 

Now you're thinking of asking me "why" aren't you? Well don't. Because I certainly don't know the reason for many of the things I do and this is one of those.

Anyways, we lived in this house in Newark, AR that had been seriously neglected by the previous tenants. There were issues that we had to address and one of the strange things was that there seemed to be shadowy movements, like out of the corner of your eye, but nothing definite.

At that time I would take out the lowers at bedtime and maybe place them on the nightstand. Who can  remember that far back?!?

So one night, we had been partying (you may interpret that in any way you wish), and I stumbled to bed, taking out the lowers and putting them in the pocket of the flannel shirt I was wearing, which I took off and dropped on the floor.

Now if you have "partied" much at all, you know that the events of the previous evening might not always be crystal clear in your memory.

So I was annoyed but not too surprised when, next morning, these teeth were not in my shirt pocket. Like maybe I just thought I put them there. But where I did put them exactly was a mystery so I had to soldier on without them. 

This was inconvenient but not life-shattering. People who "party" a lot tend to be more Zen in their attitude about such things.

To backtrack, we suspected a rodent problem. So we put out rat baits which consisted of these blue crystalline nuggets. Which were disappearing fairly rapidly so we kept putting them out, supposing I guess that there were lots of these rats who were conveniently going out side to die.

This is where it really gets hazy so bear with me. 

For some reason (and I can't even think of a reason) I was looking in the cabinet under the kitchen sink. Situated right beside it was a non-functiong dishwasher. There was a hole in the side of this perhaps like an inspection plate and glancing there I caught a glimpse of blue. 

Looking closer I saw that the whole floor under the dishwasher was completely covered with the anti-rat nuggets. It appears the little devils had not been eating them at all, but carrying them off to make a (not) comfy bed out of them.

Perched on top of this pile of rat poison was the missing lower plate. I boiled it before I stuck it back in my mouth. 

You would think this would be the end of the story but the funniest part occurred years later when I related this incident to my little Yankee buddy, Dan Haw.

He laughed so hard and so long that I thought I had killed him from laughing.

When he finally settled down and wiped away his tears, he explained that the thing that had struck him most about this tale was the image of a huge rat wearing my teeth (uppers and lowers) and smiling and going "Hotchaa!".

We never did see any of those rats, by the way.

Whatever....

 Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. -Philippians 4:4

Whatever. Is this the mantra of our age? Our go-to response at life's frustrations and aggravations, the overwhelmingness (not a word, I know, but whatever) of the whole thing? Another way of saying "I don't care" or "I quit"?

I was prompted by a friend's facebook post to re-read Philippians 4:8 and was struck by the context in which it is contained, beginning in v.4.

 

"Rejoice," Paul says, "be reasonable", "do not be anxious." 

Really, Paul? Apparently you don't know the stuff I face on a daily basis: problems of self-doubt, worry and general malaise (thanks, Jimmy Carter for that one). 

 

The general overall messiness of life itself.

 

Then "peace" is promised, and the old cynical me is tempted to respond with a weary "whatever."

 

But (writing under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit), Paul hands me back "whatever":

"...is true." It is true that I (and also you, I pray) have been saved by God's grace and given hope in the face of the world's invitation to despair.

"...is honorable." What could be more honorable than to show my gratitude for this great salvation by seeking to heed the instruction of this Word?

"...is just." It is a just and holy God who has promised these blessings. "Rejoice" indeed!

"...is pure." Again, the focus is re-directed to God who promises that we shall see his face who seek after him with purity of purpose (as given by the indwelling  Spirit).

"...is lovely." What could be more lovely than the One who died that I might live?

"...is commendable." How might I live, think and act so as to reflect glory upon my God? 

"Whatever", in this sense, is the positive opposite to the negativity with which the world inundates us and invites us to partake.

 

So whatever you do:

Rejoice!